– How Do I Care?
Your words ring hollow
Like nothing at all
Your mind looks shallow
Like a fucking cheap doll
I thought it was different
A better direction
But it isn’t pretty
A zitty complexion
I’ve been wrong before
But with things less important
I read you like a book
But I was seeing distortion
The mirror a fabrication
An image created within
How the fuck do I care?
I don’t know where to begin
I try to be positive
But find myself in fire
So how the fuck to care?
What exactly is required?
All I see is trash
Wrapped around skeletons
I want to see the flash
Endless megatons
Fuck all humanity
Even what’s inside of me
The cancer needs cut free
No one deserves to be
I used to hope
For the good I dared
Even against the ropes
Now I can’t fucking care
There’s nothing there
A dry socket
Launch the rockets
Melt the pain away
– Black At Noon
Back and forth
Glance at the screen
The mind a fire
Burning all I’ve seen
Back and forth
The sun up high
The air is still
The demons cry
Back and forth
The swing moves on
The child smiles
All hope is gone
Back and forth
To keep that joy
As hundreds die
The drones deploy
No sun I can see in the skies above
No life I can live or truth I can love
While I push my body to action for her
No shadows around as my life is a blur
All shapes are black and outlined in grey
Nothing has texture and night here as day
I wait for my pulse to stop so I can get away
My life already over but I still need to stay
Back and forth
a breeze comes through
she giggles and moves her hair aside
as i fake a smile and wait to die
– Dying Outward
the dark within
rotting up through the skin
making my heart slow down
and my mind speed up
while unable to give a fuck
i look around town, driving down
to pick up the next person
who might make me forget for a second
laughing and talking about the world
that i forget i am not interested in
while we laugh and move forward within
i try to slow the expansion
but my heart, soul, bones, all gone
no matter what i’ve done
my skin is eating away next
and i’ll finally have gone away
right in front of your eyes
and finally i’ll be over
the vibrating sounds
and deafening silence
march onward through time
as i flirt with crossing the line
from here to where there is nothing
to match my hopes and dreams
drown out these screams with explosions
disappear and leave few traces
that anyone will notice, anyway
all the things i want to complete
as my entire being gets eaten
one after another abandoned
and the rest left half finished
as i close books and bury bones
gave up on finding my way home
as dreams are realized as dreams
and reality is seen through the surface
a lie tied to a brick, at the bottom
it’s all in front of us
throughout our lives
while they point to the skies
as we’re pulled down by lies
hope drowns soon enough
and every time i give a fuck
the aids seeps in
and the destruction advances
my feet were in the water
now so far overhead
but i can’t seem to die
– Talking To The Dead
hello there
don’t fake a smile
your age shows around your eyes
i let out a deep sigh
i’m awake again.
the dream wasn’t any better
but if my heartbeat could have stopped
i could have gone to what’s next
but there you are
need to take a shower
maybe i’ll black out
crack my head open
bleed out on the floor
go grab the gun across the room
push it into your jaw, go boom
you are a cancer among the rest
departing any way would be best
just walk.
take a shovel.
you know remote desert a couple days away
just load the food to get you there
and bring your gun
let’s set out and have some fun
find a nice deep place
erase, erase, erase
don’t give them a bill, a corpse
let nature take its course
and erase, erase, erase
just leave a note
fuck you all
i hate the world
and i’m going
promise you’ll be dead this week
don’t come looking, it’s done, i’m gone
they’re all dead to me anyway
so much of the country i used to admire
may as well be swept away by fire
and maybe something better will grow
but there’s no hope to throw
in direction of unbelievable shit like that
food for the animals
let them eat well for a little while
assuming they find what’s left
after the bullets tear it apart
but it’s a start
no need to stay here
the future is clear
the end of a flushed toilet
sweeping us down the drain
into a river of piss
human life has come to this
i guess i’ll take a shower