I know he’s trolling. I was bored. Fed the bitch.

Erik James

2 hrs · 

I don’t think I’ll ever get an answer but this is a new one from these crazy people lol1Melissa Keller155 CommentsLikeCommentShare

Comments
  • Active NowJoshua Montgomery Grass has its own DNA. From seed even1Delete or hide thisHide 21 Replies
    • Erik James Joshua Montgomery each of my sperm has DNA. I’m a genocidal mother fucker.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Both of your concepts are illogical. Neither grass or sperm is a living dividing human life; growing in the womb after a women already made a choice to risk creating that life. Comparison fallacies.2Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo neither is a month old fetus that is months away from even surviving on the best technology we have.

      your terrible arguments apply to banning male masturbation and you don’t even see it.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Male sperm isn’t growing human life as you have been since conception. Might as well make it legal to abort you. You’re just a cluster of cells too.,1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James your arguments also apply to banning contraception since that’s interrupting the process too.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo now you’re on the right track.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo however I can survive outside of the womb. but you’re getting there.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo I guess you don’t know the difference between single cell and growing dividing life. You stupid MFER. See how that works?1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo I support legalizing parents to abort their kids all the way to the kids 18th birthday.

      put some power behind “I brought you into this world, I can take you out too”

      now wander back to your silly feed full of misinformation where you belong. also, might want to read about communism, socialism, and what the United States did to crush Venezuela after they tried to get off of the petro dollar. had nothing to do with socialism.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo guess you want to ignore the fact sperm is part of the process and draw your line at egg fertilization instead. I’m all inclusive.

      now go learn things. or don’t, being from Indiana.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James My argument has nothing to do with contraception, religion or anything. It has to do with human life. Just as you have been since conception. A growing cluster of human cells.1Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo The same life if you found it on Mars. You would say that you found human life.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo you can’t grasp this. back to your echo chamber.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Yep, ad hominem again. Because you know it’s true. You are just locked in with blinders to that liberal bandwagon TV infomercial mindset to go along with it. I’m neither religions and neither right or left. Just so you know. But I do try to sway people in another direction when it’s warranted.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo I’m not Liberal you moron. it’s not binary. I’m not a democrat. I’m not religious or right or left myself. Yet your arguments scream “I’M COMPLETELY CONSERVATIVE FROM INDIANA” so I’m not sure how you bark identical idiot nonsense like conservatives and pretend you’re not.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James You’re not even listening to what I’m saying regarding the life creation process.

      So no shit, you’re mislabeling me. Big surprise.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Joshua Montgomery sorry this fucktard blew up your comment notifications.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Joshua Montgomery like his fellow conservatives, they don’t understand basic formatting and progressional logic.Edit or delete this
    • Kit Chestnut Stephen Phillippo It’s so good to meet fellow vegan activists who respect life. ✊1Delete or hide this
    • Erik JamesEdit or delete thisTENOR1
    • Erik James it’s double funny because even vegans are responsible for tons of life meeting death rofl. more massive number too, just not cows and chickens and fish, but rodents and “pests” instead, while protecting crops 😀

      WE ARE ALL PARASITES, DEAL WITH IT KIT hahahaEdit or delete this
    Write a reply…
  • Erik James his wife supports teachers rofl. they have a lot of learning to do, so that’s a good thing.Edit or delete thisHide 132 Replies
    • Erik James after I posted this I realized, they might just support the moron level teachers that go out and protest abortion clinics on their off time lolEdit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Ad hominem. Funny that you attack the person. Not the argument when your argument if flawed.1Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo You’re kind of a sicko stalker it seems. You’re mind is warped.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo my argument is great. stick to one place to argue please. I’m not chasing your dumb ass around the yard.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo I’m a sicko stalker, said by the person who didn’t respond to the original comment and picked out up on my profile posts

      you really just blurt things out without thinking don’t you?Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo I am destroying your terrible arguments. you’re just not capable of grasping it.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Dude, you just keep attacking me personally. I have a ultra liberal buddy that does the same exact thing when science can prove a baby in utero has its own DNA and growing life. They didn’t know this shit in 1973 Roe V. Wade. You can’t get around science buddy. You just keep attacking the person and not the argument because your argument is totally flawed. Just as you are just a cluster of cells the same as a baby in utero then. We should allow everyone just to murder everyone then. The only reason babies can be murdered in utero is because nobody can hear or see them scream when a leg gets ripped off. Even a smaller cluster before 21 weeks is human life growing and living life as you have been since conception. You can’t deny it.

      People just want to avoid personal responsibility. “FEED ME! FUCK ME! GIVE ME A PLACE TO LIVE! I WANT TO MURDER ANY RESPONSIBILITY I WILL EVER HAVE INCLUDING A HUMAN LIFE GROWING INSIDE ME THAT I CREATED!” Liberal values in a nutshell.1Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo You know how i know this stuff? I used to be ultra liberal down the line. Then I grew up.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo I’m not a liberal. Grow up.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James sperm has it’s own dna. you’re. not. fucking. listening to me.

      but you keep. fucking. going.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James don’t worry sister, i’m making you a pretty graphic that explains why you and your conservative friends are morons.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Fuck yea sperm has its own DNA. And it’s not a diving cell growing human life is it? Comparison fallacy. Just answer these questions. Is sperm a single cell or diving life multiple cells? Is grass human DNA growing and living? Does growing by dividing and living human cells in utero grow into a baby and eventually adult humans? Does a baby in utero have its own DNA separate life from the mother?

      Just answer these simple questions that you already know the answers to but want to wear those blinders tight. And honestly I don’t give a shit if a ton of poor minorities want to slaughter their own. Because that’s who has abortions by far more percentage wise. Hey it’s less welfare and mouths to feed. The rich love that. Think hard about it.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo it’s one of many steps of the process.

      facts.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Single cell sperm that you spit all over your gay lovers face isn’t the question here. You’re trying to use a terrible comparison fallacy.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James go back to your echo chamber. you’re ridiculous.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo moving goalposts and ignoring reality isn’t impressive.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Actually you’re missing the best argument in your favor but i hate to help you. You’re too stupid to even realize it. But it’s still growing human life even with the argument that you’re missing.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo k.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo😁Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo BTW it’s cognition.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo don’t block me yet snowflake, i’m about done with making you a pretty picture.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James I WANT AN ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION:Edit or delete this
    • Erik James you think abortion is the same as drunk driving and killing a cop legally?Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James It’s called a metaphor.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Taking personal responsibility for your actions.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Personal responsibility shouldn’t be the killing of human life.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo See you’re tying to turn my metaphor into something literal to attack. It’s not exactly the same. Yet has similarities to the same irresponsible actions.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James that’s a fucking horrible metaphor. much like your inability to grasp your argument also includes banning male masturbation and contracpetives.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Why would you ban that? LOLDelete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Nobody is saying to ban a good wack job. Hell, she can even swallow all she wants.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo It’s not like she’s eating a growing human. Stop with the terrible comparison fallacies.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James but you’re so concerned about DNA and the process of humans being created.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo NopeDelete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Not at all.,Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo You’re trying to make it a convolution of the argument now. Neither a sperm or egg is a growing life is it?Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Do you consider a chicken egg that is fertilized with a growing chick in it life>?Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Would you say that you ate a chick in the egg?Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo BalutDelete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo DUck egg. WhateverDelete or hide this
    • Erik James did you conveniently miss i’m pro abortion, as long as the parents do it before the kid turns 18?Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James You added me remember? I didn’t stalk your post. I looked to see who was trying to add me to a friend list.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo You’re not listening to yourself. Is sperm single cell or growing life?Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Answer that? ???? is sperm single cell or growing life??????Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo The human is already created if it’s dividing and growing. The creation of life begins at cell division.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James it’s part of the process. there are plenty of people who think contraception should be illegal, too. how long before that becomes the fight? if we allow the goal posts to keep moving forward, after that is male masturbation.

      following along?Edit or delete this
    • Erik James the creation of life begins at [ever moving goal post]Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Contraception has no reason to be illegal. That’s the religious nuts that think that for some reason. It probably says it somewhere or construed from a bible of some sort. Single cells aren’t growing life.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James yet those are ok to cut off in the process – because right now the goal post is at splitting cells.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James the rest of the argument for “life” can be applied all the way to spilling seed. because it’s part of the process.

      meanwhile, fucking fetuses can’t even survive on machines until 24 weeks, even then it’s fucking doubtful.

      meanwhile, babies are basically etch-a-sketches for the first couple years and barely learn motor skills.

      but please, tell me more about which part of the process is OK to cut it off.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo There is no process if it’s not dividing into life. Just like a catalyst of say acid and baking soda together. It creates a reaction. The reaction to sperm and egg coming together is growing life.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Acid by itself doesn’t react. Neither does baking soda.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo we established the conservative goal post is “splitting cells.”Edit or delete this
    • Erik James can we move on?Edit or delete this
    • Erik James the rest of the argument for “life” can be applied all the way to spilling seed. because it’s part of the process.
      meanwhile, fucking fetuses can’t even survive on machines until 24 weeks, even then it’s fucking doubtful.
      meanwhile, babies are basically etch-a-sketches for the first couple years and barely learn motor skills.
      but please, tell me more about which part of the process is OK to cut it off.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Funny that you say goal post. The left is now going deeper into the rabbit hole of infanticide and now up till age 18 is okay to murder? LOLDelete or hide this
    • Erik James i keep trying to tell you i’m not a fucking leftie.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James “ok to murder” – glad to hear you’re against pointless wars and drone strikes.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Your simple etch a sketch isn’t growing human life. Great way to minimize murder though.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Hell let’s slaughter old people too then. And the handi-capped. They rely on another human when they can’t function on their own! Let’s move that goal post for the future of mankind!!Delete or hide this
    • Erik James i don’t give a fuck about human life. look at the scoreboard. there are 8 billion of us. we’re a virus.

      i never said i give a fuck about human life or murder.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo goal posts indeed.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Anyone that can’t feed themselves on welfare. Slaughter them too. They rely on others. Let’s get this shit going! Save the planet!1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo are you a trump supporter? let’s talk about human life.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo that’s exactly where i was going. trump’s actively cutting people off of lifelines. glad to hear you’re with me on that one.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo so you’re against frivolous war?Edit or delete this
    • Erik James i’m so happy you can’t follow me to the point of all this shit you’re typing rofl.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James such a triggered snowflake.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Hell, let’s make it a cleansing. Like that old movie from the 70s. I can’t remember the name of it.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Like the purge! Let’s get it on!Delete or hide this
    • Erik James So you’re against frivolous war?Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Well of course. Who loves war? Sometimes it’s better to save more lives. i said it just like two days ago. We should have nuked China and Russia in the 40s when we had all the nukes before them.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Kill a few million to save billions and the human race.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James pro life.

      Stephen Phillippo Erik James Well of course. Who loves war? Sometimes it’s better to save more lives. i said it just like two days ago. We should have nuked China and Russia in the 40s when we had all the nukes before them.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo See you’re missing my argument of facts trying to twist it. I’m not so dead set against abortion especially to save a life like the mother or a twin. I’m set against your idea that it’s justified to kill a human life in utero just because you can’t hear it scream out. It’s still human life. Like i said. mostly minorities kill their own. The rich love it. Guess which political party really has all the money. Just Google it. Hint. it’s the slavery party.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo I never said that I’m pro life LOLDelete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo I’m pro common sense. Human life is still human life.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James back during slaves, the democrats were CONSERVATIVES.

      there was a switch where the conservatives ended up going republican.

      but thanks for playing the “spout conservative talking points but pretend i’m not conservative” gameEdit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo You’re trying to argue with flawed arguments. Avoiding the science of it all together.

      Ya they just magically flipped. I get it. In the 60s or 70s, or whenever it fits your argument. LOL DUH1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James you don’t give a fuck about human life. stop pretending.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James you’re great at cherry picking. you should take up religion.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo So basically then you’re saying they just flipped. So Republicans created social security then?Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Or Democrats did that too? Just the good stuffDelete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo So Republicans created unions? Both social security and unions are good. As well as environmental issues. So Republicans were the ones to really create those back then? But now they are Democrats?Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo But wait….didn’t Democrats create that? Oh but they flipped parties. So Republicans must be the ones that created those good things!? LOL Make up my mind.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo You can’t see past your own BS.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James you’re anti unions?Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James no.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo I just said unions, social security, and environmental issues are good.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo So Republicans must have done those things right? since they flipped parties in the 60s?Delete or hide this
    • Erik James progressives created unions. if you’re going to bring up history at least know which faction was in which party.

      i have to go make breakfast for my daughter. go cherry pick your nonsense somewhere else.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Or only Democrats did the good stuff? But somehow their bad stuff flipped to Republicans? LOLDelete or hide this
    • Erik James for the record, right now democrats and republicans are both almost completely owned by the military and corporations, for profit prisons.

      but hey i’m a democrat apparently.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Hey, I agree.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James haven’t been registered democrat in fucking years. used to be, i admit it. i hadn’t paid attention. but after paying attention, i’d never register with them. nor the republicans.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Oh, I know I voted for Obama twice myself.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James so did i. but i voted third party in 2016 because there’s no way i’m voting for trash like trump and hillary.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo But not because I’m Democrat or Republican. I try to help maintain balance. There needs to be a common sense party.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James and if they slap biden’s racist horrible ass in there i’m probably doing 3rd party again.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Science included.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James stop pretending to be pro life. you’re clearly not.

      unless you’re trolling, in which case, you’ve wasted enough of my time, now fuck off.1Edit or delete this
    • Erik James you’re not starting yet another fucking bunch of comment threads to follow.

      paste that shit here.1Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James You have to keep up son.Delete or hide this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik JamesDelete or hide thisTENOR
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo not with somebody who spouts nonsense, clouds it, and spreads it over multiple comments.1Edit or delete this
    • Erik James your bullshit stays on this thread. I’m not moving around for you anymore.

      smell too much like a troll.1Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Aw, you lost and ran. I get it.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James No. I’m not going to engage you in 2, no 3, no 4, no 6, no 10 comment strings.

      do it here, you dumb fuck.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James though i would completely expect you, who focuses on points you’re making and ignores or briefly swats it with attacking format instead of addressing the actual content, would think you won.

      that’s adorable.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James maybe you’re too stupid to understand. guess you like having comments deleted instead of posting them here.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James I’m not joking with you, troll boy.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James fuck the reality proposed in clockwork orange, and 1984.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James this is why I think you’re the one actually trolling. all these complete stretches.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo https://www.smithsonianmag.com/…/babys-cells-can…/Delete or hide thisSMITHSONIANMAG.COMBaby’s Cells Can Manipulate Mom’s Body for DecadesBaby’s Cells Can Manipulate Mom’s Body for Decades
    • Stephen Phillippo Interesting read. Now before you even start. Natural death vs man caused are two totally different things. Just stopping you before you start.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo now before *i* even start? HAHAHAEdit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo https://www.newscientist.com/…/dn8865-abortion-science…/Delete or hide thisNEWSCIENTIST.COMAbortion: Science, politics and morality collideAbortion: Science, politics and morality collide
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo what do you think my argument is in favor of abortion. please summarize it.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo That’s all i’m posting today. Gotta get some shit done off work today. Later fool.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo thanks for the homework, troll.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James fucking piece of retarded shit1Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James I resemble that remark,Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Glenn beck does a far better job of making shitty arguments. and he’s transparent too.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Um, I’m not Glenn Beck. He’s just making controversy to make $$$. Maybe I should get my own show.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo you’re just trolling to be intolerable.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James all I’m trying to say is the line the conservatives chose to draw applies a little bump over to male masturbation too. but you just like to smear shit.Edit or delete this
    • Stephen Phillippo Erik James Summary: Lacking science. Argumentum ad populum.1Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Stephen Phillippo troll harder.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James science : a fetus develops a heart long before it develops any other organs, including the brain.

      the heartbeat bill is fucking nonsense.

      like your science hat worn on your vapid string of ignoring the point I’m making.Edit or delete this
    • Erik James iM sO sMaRt AnD eDuCaTeD i DoNt EvEn KnOw ThE mAsSiVe DiFfErEnCe BeTwEeN cOmMuNiSm AnD sOcIaLiSm

      probably don’t know the difference between democratic socialism and national socialism, either.

      yew sew smurtEdit or delete this
    • Erik James HE WON! HE WON THE WHOLE THING!!!!!!!!! SO SMART!!!!! ROPING IN HARDLY RELATED SHIT LIKE CHANGES WOMEN GO THROUGH DURING PREGNANCY (and to be fair, how the changes persist) AND IGNORING THE MOUNTAIN OF POINTS NEXT TO IT THAT FACTOR INTO DECISION MAKING

      THE WINNER!!!!!!! hahahahah

      failtroll is fail. and i mock onward.Edit or delete this
    • Active NowPissed Guy His wife’s kinda cute.Delete or hide this
    • Erik James Pissed Guy brown bagger, for sure.Edit or delete this

roooooofl, INSANE

Wendi Miller

21 hrs · 

Ladies you know we are going bitch and moan about that guy looking at you to your man which will start a fight. Etc….have some sense.Abigail OgleLike PageYesterday at 4:24 PM · 

👍🏼COOL or NOT COOL😡?

What do you think? Oklahoma women can now go topless in public. The decision came after two women who are part of a social media movement called “Free the Nipple” filed a lawsuit arguing that being topless is acceptable for men and therefore also should be for women.

The ruling comes from The 10th Circuit Court of Appeals.4You and 3 others58 CommentsLikeCommentShare

Comments

Pondbrain: Death Imminent

The umbrella of Pondbrain is going to be disappearing. The website will remain as a redirect. It will be changing to Empty Hope.

A conversation came up in the process of moving forward with another push, trying to monetize the huge body of work I’ve built up, which looks like it will be dwarfed with what’s built up in my head that I’ve been squeezing out. The question was asked, where did you get Pondbrain? And through answering it, I, all by myself, realized it sounds lame, and it’s confusing. Without knowing the story, that is. So a first time person seeing pond brain? pondbrain? what? I get it.

Empty Hope may be depressing, but most of my shit is arguably dark, and depressing. Perhaps, of-depression. But still. Far more fitting in multiple ways, and not as nonsense at a glance.

We’ll see.

No Thank You

I love the idea of starting a blog again. I just don’t like the idea of shitting up the pondbrain feed with it.  So I’ll update this post with a link to my blog.

 

Just as soon as I make it.

here it is.  don’t be surprised how shitty the content is.

also, it’s partly in character as MC G.F.Y. and partially blog of my day to day.  so I mean ….. don’t take anything personally. ILY.

EDIT 2018.12.30 . naw fuck that, I’m going to use M.C. GO FUCK YOURSELF exclusively for that shit.  though I don’t know why I slapped it on MCGFY, here is where i’m going to blog.  Want to make like 90 pieces on here to bury this post so nobody finds this blog, but here. Actually I know why.  I slapped it on MCGFY to force me to keep it and do stuff with it. It’ll be fun. I promise.

The Gift

Beth was throwing up and hershey squirting while she was in Omaha. Lily was puking a lot for a couple days when she came back from Omaha.  I lasted a good week without catching anything from them.  Then, Lily loves me, it’s so sweet.  But we were sleeping on the couch and she decided to use my head as a pillow.  So I woke up to find her cheek on mine and her face the same direction as mine and I had a feeling I was screwed.

Cut to two days later, my sinuses start going crazy. I felt weak at work and I wasn’t sure if it was sinuses or what. Then Beth wanted PETE’S FISH AND CHIPS, which is delicious, and very shortly after eating it I felt terrible. I was blaming that, but Beth and Lily had absolute zero signs of anything, and we all ate the exact same stuff.

By 3am, I was pretty certain it wasn’t food poisoning. It’s 24 hours later and I still have a 100-102 fever, depending on how long since I took aspirin. Plus it started pretty hard within 45 minutes of finishing eating. So I’m comfortable with the groundwork already having been there to start destroying the food down to the nightmare that followed.

About the 3am hour I started drinking this awesome juice flavoring added water I’ve been in love with for the last several months. I was crazy thirsty after throwing up and blowing liquid into the pooper. Then, the next time I puked, it tasted a whole lot better. I think it was a win win. This cycle continued well into the morning. 

Loving this entry? I’ll change the subject.  So, I picked this up:

SonCam_Camera3_20181226065717

He came up out of between those last 2 bushes, out of the rain drain. I’m disappointed the camera didn’t catch him coming over the wall, or from the rocks behind, or wherever he came from. 

 

I SAW SOMETHING

Today was a decent day. The highlight I am sad to say was me being excited for no reason then being disappointed.  I was going through the motion alarms on the security footage and saw a guy riding his bike down the canal who stopped right in front of the neighbor’s back rocks. I was like HEY WHAT’S THIS, IS THE DUMB ASS STUPID ENOUGH TO oh…. He just stopped in the shade of the tree to clean his sunglasses. 

That is all. 

Pick a fight, then call incel for fighting.

Tosha Hawkins Bill is much worse. Poor hills
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Quinton Effin Beaudry Fuck, you made me envision something worse than dying of fire..
3some.

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Erik Smith Imagine those two evil dicks fucking .. Jesus

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Dennise Garcia Tosha Hawkins he totally is. You’d think with all that money he could buy a new face with smooth, non blotchy, nongrowthy-like skin. Eeeughhhhhhh
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Tosha Hawkins Dennise Garcia id SOOO rather fuck hill over him. He’s vomit inducing
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Tosha Hawkins Erik Smith fu king Jesus?’ Omg that’s so deranged
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Erik Smith Tosha Hawkins her war hawk homophobic nature turns me off at least as much as his predator nature

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Tosha Hawkins Erik Smith he had an affair. Grow the fuck up. Fucking idiot.

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Erik Smith Tosha Hawkins ……………… Yeah he’s a piece of shit. I’m not defending him. What the fuck is wrong with you

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Tosha Hawkins Erik Smith he’s not a predator. He had an affair.. why is that so hard for you to comprehend? Are you daft?
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Erik Smith Tosha Hawkins ……. Oh. So you don’t know about Lolita air?

…….. Pizzagate is bullshit. Lolita air is well known and logged. Only reason I’m entertaining this from you is I respect Crystal.

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Tosha Hawkins Erik Smith wtf does crystal have to do with anything?! Lmao. Go fuck yourself 😁 
I’m not a fan of the Clinton’s-but he’s not a predator for having an affair. 🙄

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Erik Smith Tosha Hawkins he’s a predator for fucking underage girls. Look up lolita air.

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Tosha Hawkins Erik Smith I LOVE FB fights with incels! Sweet.

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Erik Smith And go fuck yourself, too. Extending you kindness in return to your rude fucking bullshit because I like her and you two are friends.

How about just go fuck yourself, ignorant bitch ass cunt.

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Erik Smith How’s that, is that what you wanted? Christ.

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Stays the Same

I’ve been pondering off and on for years. How do I present my everything? My writing, my music, my art of various forms. Some people have voiced appreciation for the totally open dumping of everything personal. Others have voiced concern, stating it’s no way to be a salesman. I just don’t know. I’ve been an open book my whole life.

Over the last week I dumped a few dozen hours in a few different “website builder” modules. The results ranged from unsatisfactory to just “what the fuck is this nonsense shitty website builder? nice try but shitty shitty McShitty.” After all of that, I looked back on what is here for the first time in almost 100 hours of working on website related things. The infrastructure is already here and it’s pretty well in motion.  There is a lot that I could and should post about various projects.

Here is a list of things in varying stages of movement forward:

 

Audio:

HATE ALL LISTENERS:
A full length album is under development. Along with a second one, conceptually.

SYMPHONY OF NOISE:
INFINITE MACHINE is under development. This will be Vent 8.
GOD IS VOID is dead, I will write a long post about the life and death of this project.
FOUR NEOPLATONIST HIEROGLYPHS is under development. Not sure if will be Vent 9, or will be released in 4 parts as 9-12.
REPETITIVE is under development and will be a full album under the Zero numbering system.
CAN’T SEE OUT ANYMORE is an album I’ve been putting very specific things into, probably ending up a future vent.

There is a secret page stashed in an unlinked location full of the “mixtapes” I’ve made. This has been expanded a lot more than I ever imagined it would be after the first “mixtape” I made called Livid. Livid, I believe, is fairly easy to find.

 

Text:

HUMAN BLOOD: I have started work on this trilogy of novels. I had a rough draft of the first book that was 46 pages. I started rewriting it, not including the several times larger amount of things that weren’t in the draft. The first four words, being detailed out to match what was in my head, turned into over 70 words. That scared me off. But after my first novel was under my belt, I knew this one would come back to the table eventually.

DESCENT TRILOGY: The second book is underway. The third book I didn’t even have in my head when writing the first one, is blowing into my head.

KRINKET: What was a various number of projects coalesced into one book. It’ll just be a huge memory dump of my entire life as best I can remember it, all the way up until I die. Probably will never be released.

SCOPE: a book about the sniper that sparked the civil war in the PONDIVERSE Descent takes place in.

INHERIT: a fantasy novel involving a man and his friend investigating a property.

LACERATION: a book that started off as me venting into a text file, and I just kept adding to it. It’s a lot more fun to write than I think it probably should be. Might not even be legal to release, honestly.

 

Painting:

I should just take pictures of the weird thing I’m working on now. I’ll just put it like this, I made a bunch of cardboard panels connected with thin cardboard panels and I’m fucking making a mockery of whatever the fuck I think I’m doing with painting, on those panels.

 

Other:

I sure love photography but I really don’t know what if anything I’m going to do with the many thousands of pictures I already have.  There have been a few websites and subsites that have come and gone that I don’t even think I linked to anything. Just haven’t been remotely happy with anything I’ve tried with them. I think the problem is there are seriously thousands of pictures I can’t really choose between for use for whatever the hell. I don’t even know. I don’t know.

Medication




When I was 10? 11? I was put on medication for Epilepsy. With that, they also put me on medication to attempt better control of my behavioral disorders my family and schools had been dealing with over the years.

At some point, they had tried so many combinations that weren’t working, they pulled me back into the hospital for a month to try some others. One, they sent me home because they needed a bed for a week. I went right back the next day because I was sleep walking and my mom found me in the garage. I was at or younger than 12.

After that I ended up in lockup for a few years because of a stupid decision that had a consequence my friend and I somehow didn’t foresee. While in lockup I was recreationally trashing a kitchen when I saw a door opening. I went to slam it and had not seen the arm put between the door and the frame to keep it from shutting.

Putting an arm in the door, with me being the one going off, was a safe gamble. All the staff that knew me, knew I wouldn’t hurt anybody. But, I didn’t see it. Since their wrist was terribly bruised, they had to press 3rd degree assault charges on me so their insurance would cover it.

Before I turned 17 I had worked my way out and was back home. When I turned 18 I was told I could make my own decisions and get off medication. I wanted to, to see how I handled it. I figured I had made so many advances from the lowest while I was in prison, to the highest I felt when I was quickly expanding friends in highschool.

In hindsight, that was a horrible mistake. It went well during my highs but my lows were lower than I remembered and sometimes lasted months. I dropped even further into depression after a horrible breakup (which was entirely my fault, I fully admit) just before my 19th birthday (end of 1999). While I was still trying to get through that part of my mind fighting me, at the end of 2001 it wasn’t much better. I ended up developing agoraphobia which persisted until roughly 2004.

Mid 2004 through mid 2014 was better as I was pouring myself into everything I’ve done art-related. The more projects I threw myself into and the more games I lost myself in, the better I was doing.

As 2014 moved I started panicking because I estimated there was about 50 hours of stuff I would ideally like to do each day. Even if I never slept again, clearly that left me 26 hours short. Yes, I mapped out how much time each thing would take, and how much free time I had and tried to pick things I most wanted to do, so I felt better about my to do list vs. my free time.

Then, about a month after I was getting in the swing of ignoring those which didn’t make the cut – the wife informed me she seriously wanted to have a kid.

As anyone should know, a kid = death of free time. So this essentially kicked the legs out from under everything I had built to keep me out of the morass I had been in from 1988-2004. And it has only gotten worse since.

So now I’m looking back to medication – which hopefully will start a week from tomorrow. I’ve been trying to push myself to even schedule an appointment with a psychologist.

In september of 2014 I went to my GP and he put me on a pill I can not remember the name of, but it was great. The insurance company wouldn’t fund it without me playing phone tag every month so they switched me to Effexor. Effexor was a nightmare. So in May 2015 I finally couldn’t take it anymore and researched how to pull myself off the medicine. I slowly dropped dosage by counting out the pebbles individually so I was taking 3 less per pill. Sure, it took about a month and a half to fully ween off it, but it finally worked.

I went back to trying on my own but closing in on the two year anniversary of pulling myself back off, as I said, I feel it is absolutely essential to try again.

I don’t know how many pills I’ve tried over the years but I’m hoping I can gravitate towards one that will work out.

Just wanted to slap this up for future reference. I might write up a more detailed accounting of my time jumping around group homes, psych wards and the 7 months I spent in Eldora (kiddie prison) .. It was an interesting time for me because it was essentially pushing boundaries and observing processes and humans around me.